Leaving a tween at home for the first time can be stressful for the parents and the tween. It is important to begin open dialogue in regards to the expectations of the child when no parent is present in the home. Phone etiquette and answering the door should be discussed before the tween is left alone for 5 minutes or 3 hours.
Phone Etiquette
Based on individual family dynamics, the phone may or may not be answered when the tween is left home alone. Parents may suggest it goes to voicemail and only if the parents are on the other line, it is to be answered. As well, parents may invest in caller id to allow the child to know who is calling.
A child at home should not be on the phone socially since a parent may need to communicate with them. All lines of communication should be available. As well, the parent may choose to only call the tween on her cell phone and have her just ignore the land line in the home.
Tweens must be aware of all the rules regarding phone use before they are left alone. It may be ideal to post the phone rules for the child to look over when in doubt of a rule.
Door Safety
Children should not be answering unexpected knock at the doors. Moms and dads who have forgotten the keys can give a quick call to let them know they are on the other side of the door. Even with peep holes, it is best for tweens to ignore knocks on doors.
Doors should be closed and locked when the tween is at home. As well, if their is a security code it is important for them to not tell friends even their best friends. As soon, as the child enters the home she can punch in the code to secure the premises. As a rule, children should not answer the door to ensure they remain safe in the home environment.
Role Play
Discussing the rules and regulations is the first step in preparing a child to be left home alone. Role playing is a wonderful tool to bring insight to the child of what is expected of them. Have the child be the parent and the stay at home tween to understand the rules.
Role playing is a strategy to invite children to decide on the appropriate response to a specific scenario. For example, a parent may knock on the door and the tween must act out what she would do in this specific scenario. Role playing can be done over several weeks to reinforce the different expectations of the child.
Leaving a child to stay at home can be a stressful experience. Reduce the stress by preparing the tween by reviewing the rules and role playing. As well, keep the first few home alone experiences short and extend the time as the tween and parents become more comfortable with the situation.
Debbie DeSpirt - Debbie DeSpirt is an Elementary Teacher for the York Catholic District School Board in Ontario, Canada. Her post secondary education ...
